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Lemur-ing
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Today, July 30th, is exactly 1 year after we lost my Grandma and it was the toughest period of my life.

I still remember a lot of things from that day and the funeral processions and still find it so, very hard.

It may have been a year but I'm still learning how to live without her and I miss her so, very, very much all the time and would give anything at all for a moment to share with her.

Things were made a little easier with the company of great friends who added laughter, fun, adventures and coolness to my life this past year and I'm more than thankful and ever so grateful for everyone who contributed.

I remember almost deciding to take the train in the opposite direction after a few stops away from home on my way to school as I thought of going home. Why? Because that was going to be the very first time I was going to school without my Grandma expecting me home later, being really happy to see me, or asking when I'll be home.

She does this all the time, every time and it's such a great feeling to come home to her cheerful greetings every single time (unless I come back late etc). I'm glad I decided to still go for class that day because had I not, I'd have never met a lost Swedish girl looking for her lecture theater who then became one of my really good friends.

And I'm glad she invited me and another friend of mine on a Fall Break trip with her and a friend as I made new friends on that trip and also became better friends with a couple of friends then. I was happy a very good buddy of mine suggested it was good for me to go on this trip too.

Today, I honestly wish I could pay respects to her memorial ground but I'm away. It's gonna be a hard day ahead when I start the day later.

Just wanted to share this with you guys.

Grandma - you helped me become the man I am and I hope I never forget the wonderful memories. I still hear your voice in my head like you're talking to me from time to time and I still dream you're around at times. I hope I keep doing so actually.

 

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Banned
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3,060 Posts
Normally I'd say something clever about her turning us since you can't lose a person, but like you my Grandmother passed away last fall at 89. After suffering from the effects of Alzheimer's for the last 12 years we were nearly grateful for her passing What made her our Grandmother, or my dad's mom, etc..., had left us years earlier so we had been in mourning for quite some time. It didn't make it much easier, but it was more gradual than when both Grandfathers had passed.

She's till with me in so many ways, and I suspect your Grandmother is still with you in similar ways.

I know, it isn't easy missing family.
 

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Spicy Dumpling
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9,721 Posts
It's always hard on days like today. But as you are doing remember the good times and the great stories. We lost my mom in 2006, today was her birthday, it gets a little easier, it never gets easy.
 

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Jerkhard Sirdribbledick
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27,035 Posts
Nice write-up, Ooze. Come around more often.
 

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Lemur-ing
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18,987 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
I recall when she was staying in an uncle's home or aunt's place for a few days and not long after, when my mom called (she usually calls daily), my Grandma would ask "When are you bringing me back? Bring me home" and such. She just loves our home and it was so different without her this past whole year. I also remember my mom and I always making jokes about her 'wanting to go to another home sometimes to spend time with other kids' and then not liking it at times and oh boy, those were funny/good/nice family times.

It was particularly hard because she went from being very healthy to suddenly being weak, bed-ridden and then unable to speak and then she passed. No illness. Just that way. It was too soon. It'll always be too soon.

I'm of course grateful for being able to live with her, to share so much, learn a lot and take many memories (but I can't remember a lot too and I want to... This sucks) with me. And, the friends who helped make it easier along the way - here, home, other countries and such.

I don't know what to do today honestly.

Thanks for the words guys.

//I've been pretty much moving around a fair bit Roebuck but I'll see how it goes.
 
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