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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have to entertain a 3 month old little boy all day. I have never changed a diaper before. I'm doomed.
 

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Resident Dutchbag
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paint said:
I have to entertain a 3 month old little boy all day. I have never changed a diaper before. I'm doomed.
At three months there's little entertaining to do, all you need to take care of is to keep one end fed and the other side clean. Changing diapers is easy, it's removing baby dung from their buttocks that can be a real issue. :D
 

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Strained coccyx etc etc
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rogger said:
At three months there's little entertaining to do, all you need to take care of is to keep one end fed and the other side clean. Changing diapers is easy, it's removing baby dung from their buttocks that can be a real issue. :D
exactly. i've changed around 3,000 diapers in my time as a daddy, and can tell you this:

eww.
 

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Strained coccyx etc etc
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ps: we got motherf****** snakes!!!!!!
 

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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Well he seems to like little house on the prairie. So hopefully that keeps him quiet for a while.
 

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Banned forever.....or not
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That's what the hose sprayer is for, on the kitchen sink. More than adults, babies are totally full of sh*t.
Tip#1. Have the new diaper "real" close at hand.
 

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haiku d'etat said:
exactly. i've changed around 3,000 diapers in my time as a daddy, and can tell you this:

eww.
Baby's first poo, AKA meconium, is like frigging NASA glue, and green. I swear there's nothing stickier, skeered the bejaizus outta me.
 

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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Our hose sprayer is broked. :(

He's doing that thing now where he kicks his legs as hard and fast as he can 'til he runs out of breath. He can't crawl quite yet, but it'll be soon. And dude, he's spoiled. He loves to be held and talked to constantly.
 

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I like to be held and talked to constantly too. Preferably by a woman with large mammary glands. I digress.......

Man, babies are great. I miss when our little girl was a baby. She actually smelled good then! But when she would do a "doodle", she would suck her breath in repeatedly to let us know! It was hilarious. You had to be there.

I learned that the high quality 3m paint masks do a good job blocking the scent during changing times...

 

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paint said:
Our hose sprayer is broked. :(

He's doing that thing now where he kicks his legs as hard and fast as he can 'til he runs out of breath. He can't crawl quite yet, but it'll be soon. And dude, he's spoiled. He loves to be held and talked to constantly.
The legs are getting stronger, but to crawl he needs a stronger core. Get him to do some crunches and stuff. Jeez, get with the program. :rolleyes:
 

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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
This kid is like yarble - he eats himself to sleep.
 

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Shirtcocker
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paint said:
I have to entertain a 3 month old little boy all day. I have never changed a diaper before. I'm doomed.
what crime did you commit to get stuck with that duty? and what parent would leave a 3 month old with someone with no baby experience?
 

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MR_GRUMPY said:
That's what the hose sprayer is for, on the kitchen sink. More than adults, babies are totally full of sh*t.
Tip#1. Have the new diaper "real" close at hand.
and if a boy...washcloth over the willy at all times...you'll thank me later.
 

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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
Oh, I hang out with him and play with him all the time. I've just never had to change a diaper. He's really an extremely well-behaved baby, just a bit spoiled. He belongs to my bestest friend. I got to go back when they did the C-section. Of course, I didn't watch anything - but I was there. ;)

Anyway, the sitter cancelled at like 9pm last night and her mom got called into work, so she had to use me as a last resort. :rolleyes:
 

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More Cowbell!
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paint said:
He's really an extremely well-behaved baby, just a bit spoiled.
There is no way to spoil a baby. C'mon, a human at it's most vulnerable time of life wants to feel secure in the arms of an adult? Like that's not to be expected? :rolleyes:
 

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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
There are plenty of ways to spoil a baby. I think he's cute as pie, but he's definitely spoiled rotten.
 

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paint said:
There are plenty of ways to spoil a baby. I think he's cute as pie, but he's definitely spoiled rotten.
Put down the spork and back away from the baby. ;)
 

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In need of sock puppet
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Paint,

Thanks for PMing me the baby's picture - it is soooo cute. I was a little surprised to get it, we don't message that frequently, but you should know this about me - there's no better way to start the day off than to see a picture of an infant enjoying their toys.

Out of curiosity, why didn't you post the picture here?

Cooper
 

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here comes trouble
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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
You're a dork, coop. ;)
 

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just keep a wipe between you and him

when you change. lil boys tend to spray. jingle keys, sing songs,pretty easy to tend to a 3 month old. if he's crying and flexing his legs he has gas. burp him. feed, burp, change, sleep, keep mildly entertained
 
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