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No hero that's understood
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
When you are exiting a store and you see someone coming towards the door, when is it appropriate to hold the door for them.

Example:

This morning, when I stopped at the C store for a diet Coke on the way to work, I was about to leave when I saw a woman walking from the gas pumps towards the store. She was 50' - 75' from the door so I wound up holding the door for a somewhat extended period of time. In order to minimize the amount of time I spent holding the door, she sped up. This caused her to stumble a bit and walk at an awkwardly quick pace. By the time she got to the door, I felt like I had gotten this wrong. In my effort to be courteous, I had embarrassed her, caused her to rush and probably didn't help her in any significant way.

Additional facts:

1.) She was not hawt and I would not have hit it.
2.) It was a nice sunny day and weather was not a factor.
3.) I was in no particular hurry and did not exude impatience.

So, how far away is too far away when it comes to door holding. Is this like pornography, "You know it when you see it", or is there some unwritten, weather condition dependent, rule that states the appropriate distance?
 

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Steaming piles of opinion
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q_and_a said:
1.) She was not hawt and I would not have hit it.
Decisioning loop ends.

Hold the door long enough that you aren't creating a traffic jam, or so that they aren't going to have to reach out to catch the door. If it's got time to close before they arrive at their natural pace, it's theirs to open.

If 1), then as long as you choose to get your eyeful. Just recognize this small act of chivalry wouldn't be advancing your cause in any way.
 

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q_and_a said:
When you are exiting a store and you see someone coming towards the door, when is it appropriate to hold the door for them.

Example:

This morning, when I stopped at the C store for a diet Coke on the way to work, I was about to leave when I saw a woman walking from the gas pumps towards the store. She was 50' - 75' from the door so I wound up holding the door for a somewhat extended period of time. In order to minimize the amount of time I spent holding the door, she sped up. This caused her to stumble a bit and walk at an awkwardly quick pace. By the time she got to the door, I felt like I had gotten this wrong. In my effort to be courteous, I had embarrassed her, caused her to rush and probably didn't help her in any significant way.

Additional facts:

1.) She was not hawt and I would not have hit it.
2.) It was a nice sunny day and weather was not a factor.
3.) I was in no particular hurry and did not exude impatience.

So, how far away is too far away when it comes to door holding. Is this like pornography, "You know it when you see it", or is there some unwritten, weather condition dependent, rule that states the appropriate distance?
50-75 feet is way too far to hold a door. Maybe 15-20'?
 

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Low rep power
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Factors include hawtness (or disability) of the approaching person, how much of a hurry I'm in, weather, my general outlook on life that day, and what I'm carrying at the time.
 

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25.806975801127
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Way too far away.

a) you made her walk fast and stumble - fail
b) you let precious air-conditioned air out and heat in - BIG FAIL
c) she wasn't hawt.
 

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Custom User Title
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This is 2010, let them get their own door...unless hawt/hit it. Everyone needs a sense of accomplishment, let them open their own doors.
 

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No hero that's understood
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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
PlatyPius said:
b) you let precious air-conditioned air out and heat in - BIG FAIL
.
No fail here, there was a vestibule. The AC stayed inside.

The other fails are accurate though, thus the reason for the question.
 

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Still On Steel
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danl1 said:
If it's got time to close before they arrive at their natural pace, it's theirs to open.
^^^^ This. If an elderly or handicapped person is approaching and needs a few more seconds to get there, I'll hold it open a bit longer; or even allow it to close, wait, open it again. As with most things, there are exceptions depending on the circumstances.
 

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q_and_a said:
No fail here, there was a vestibule. The AC stayed inside.

The other fails are accurate though, thus the reason for the question.
All of the outside heat went into the vestibule. Next person that enters brings it all in with them. Heat seeks out air conditioning like a Lownger seeks nookie.
 

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Hot or not, that act of opening a door for a woman is dead. You know, who gives a damn how far away she was... you can bet she appreciated the act and thoughtfulness. 2010 or not, screw that crap- it's just the right thing to do. I open doors for women, if too far and they speed up, I just let them know to take their time. They smile, very frequently surprised and grateful.
 

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Captain Obvious
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danl1 said:
f it's got time to close before they arrive at their natural pace, it's theirs to open.
this^^
 

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No hero that's understood
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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
While growing up, my mother stressed manners and polite behavior.

To this day, people still give me a hard time for saying "No thank you" to street vendors in New York who are giving me the hard sell on fake Rolexes.

My mother thought Nancy Regan was rude. She thought the anti-drug slogan should have been, "Just say no thank you".
 

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Sometimes I slow to time it so she is closer to the door. A little civility is a good thing, I think.
 

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waterproof*
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q_and_a said:
...I stopped at the C store for a diet Coke

In order to draw meaningful lessons, it's important to fully understand that the cascading sequence of failures begins here.

9 feet.
 

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No hero that's understood
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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
Creakyknees said:
In order to draw meaningful lessons, it's important to fully understand that the cascading sequence of failures begins here.

9 feet.
Actually, the cascading sequence of failures started when I drank the last one and forgot to grab some from the case I have in the basement and so none were cold when I left for work.
 

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voodooguy said:
Hot or not, that act of opening a door for a woman is dead. You know, who gives a damn how far away she was... you can bet she appreciated the act and thoughtfulness. 2010 or not, screw that crap- it's just the right thing to do. I open doors for women, if too far and they speed up, I just let them know to take their time. They smile, very frequently surprised and grateful.
^^^This.

I always hold the door for women... hot or not. For elderly men as well if they look like me taking a few seconds out of my day will make things a little easier for them.
 

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She was not hawt and I would not have hit it

That's especially classy of you, then. I say hold the door if there's any chance it'll slam shut just as they get within a couple seconds of it.
 

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Call me a Fred
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You failed in that you did not hold your had out for a tip.
 
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