Road Bike, Cycling Forums banner
1 - 20 of 50 Posts

·
Back from the dead
Joined
·
20,626 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
My son, who turns one this weekend, woke up this morning so I got him started a diaper change. I took off the old one, and then the little squirmer wouldn't sit still while I got the new one on. He does this all the time, and sometimes I don't feel like fighting it and just let him wander around for a few minutes. He gets to air things out, if you know what I mean. So I took the old diaper and put it in the diaper bin, and when I came back, I walked over to him and...

Squish.

Uh oh.

What the hell?

Oh.
My.
God.

My boy had crapped on the floor, and was still standing in it. Naturally, after standing in poo, he wanted to walk around the room. I stopped him, but now I was completely paralyzed. How can I get anything to clean this up without letting go of him and making it worse? The alternative is to pick him up, and get dripping poo all over myself. Not that hard of a choice, really. The poo comes out easier from clothes than it does rugs. All part of being a dad, I guess.

I also discovered he had peed, in a separate spot.

Lesson learned: No more walking around without a diaper.
 

·
Lemur-ing
Joined
·
18,987 Posts
Oh damn. That sucks.

Good luck with the cleaning man.
 

·
I Type, Therefore I Am
Joined
·
1,641 Posts
1. pick up child and carry to the tub
2. wash said child and add diaper
3. deal with the mess in the other room
 

·
had it in the ear before
Joined
·
13,965 Posts
you change diapers inside the house?
 

·
jaded bitter joy crusher
Joined
·
19,723 Posts
catzilla said:
Yeah, we've got the same rule for Grandpa.
Grandpa? I thought your man beast made that rule for you after last week.
 

·
midnight melon mounter
Joined
·
6,621 Posts
Pop quiz, hotshot. The floor is covered in crap, there's a pee spot soaking into the carpet, the baby is smeared with poo below the waist, and the dog is 15 seconds away from discovering this treat and rolling all over it. What do you do?
 

·
Back from the dead
Joined
·
20,626 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Alex-in-Evanston said:
Pop quiz, hotshot. The floor is covered in crap, there's a pee spot soaking into the carpet, the baby is smeared with poo below the waist, and the dog is 15 seconds away from discovering this treat and rolling all over it. What do you do?
What else is there to do? I called for my wife!
 

·
Adorable Furry Hombre
Joined
·
30,963 Posts
So junior dumps and pees on your floor...and the 1st thing you do is post about it in The Lounge?
 

·
had it in the ear before
Joined
·
13,965 Posts
Alex-in-Evanston said:
Pop quiz, hotshot. The floor is covered in crap, there's a pee spot soaking into the carpet, the baby is smeared with poo below the waist, and the dog is 15 seconds away from discovering this treat and rolling all over it. What do you do?
pop open an easy drinking natty light.
 

·
Lemur-ing
Joined
·
18,987 Posts
Room 1201 said:
So junior dumps and pees on your floor...and the 1st thing you do is post about it in The Lounge?
I wonder if his computer is covered with crap.

The bigger question is, did he post after the cleansing or,:yikes:, before??!!
 

·
Glue Sniffer
Joined
·
4,598 Posts
Room 1201 said:
So junior dumps and pees on your floor...and the 1st thing you do is post about it in The Lounge?
I know, right? I mean, obviously, the first thing he should do is take a picture and then post about it on The Lounge.
 

·
Adorable Furry Hombre
Joined
·
30,963 Posts
mohair_chair said:
It happened three hours ago. I'm at work now.
It woulda been more funny if this happened at work :)
 

·
yup
Joined
·
2,726 Posts
Wow this brings back memories!

My girls used to run around the house naked as toddlers screaming "I'm getting fresh air!! I'm getting fresh air!!" This was particularly hilarious the day the younger one got some "fresh air" at a friends house with dozens of strangers. Yes, we are the parents of the tiny streaker.
 

·
I Type, Therefore I Am
Joined
·
1,641 Posts
gutfiddle said:
pop open an easy drinking natty light.
Isn't this your answer for everything?
 
1 - 20 of 50 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top