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Hmmm, lessee... Here's how I spot newbs:

10. Chainring tattoos on your right calf

9. Inability to ride a straight line

8. Surging / slowing when it's your pull

7. Kickstand / Reflectors / Spoke protector

6. Knee-high white tube socks

5. No helmet

4. Chainring tattoos on your left calf

3. Underwear under your lycra

2. Asking questions like "How do I keep from looking like a total newb?" on an internet forum.

1. Answering questions like "How do I keep from looking like a total newb?" on an internet forum.
 

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you forgot to tell em to wear their underwear outside their shorts, never let anyone pass them and the cardinal rule of roadies--never, ever wave when someone waves to you. :cool:
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
tdhood said:
10. Chainring tattoos on your right calf
OK. I'll try to avoid these. My wife has made it almost one month and 40-50 miles without one of these. However, she just put on the clipless pedals.

tdhood said:
9. Inability to ride a straight line
I've been on a road bike before (when they were called 10-12 speeds. So, I hope this isn't an issue.

tdhood said:
8. Surging / slowing when it's your pull
What's "your pull"? I'm taking a stab that its your turn to lead the pack in a group ride.

tdhood said:
7. Kickstand / Reflectors / Spoke protector
None/none/none. Good here.

tdhood said:
6. Knee-high white tube socks
I don't even own these.

tdhood said:
5. No helmet
Have one of these.

tdhood said:
4. Chainring tattoos on your left calf
I have NO idea how one would get these and dont want to know.

tdhood said:
3. Underwear under your lycra
This seems akin to wearing underwear with a bathing suit.

tdhood said:
2. Asking questions like "How do I keep from looking like a total newb?" on an internet forum.
You got me here.

tdhood said:
1. Answering questions like "How do I keep from looking like a total newb?" on an internet forum.
:D
 

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Just go out and ride. I find road bike people are generally nice and if they notice you are a newbie will point out things to you. OTOH if you are really strong and kick their butts on a ride it doesnt really matter.
 

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my 2 cents

Avoid really large "under the seat" bags, or saddle bags. Get a nice small, unobtrusive size bag, attached snug under the seat...nothing worse than seeing a suitcase sized bag flopping around under a riders a**.
 

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please explain...

tdhood said:
Hmmm, lessee... Here's how I spot newbs:

10. Chainring tattoos on your right calf
QUOTE]

How does this identify someone as a newb? Just because you occasionally happen to lean your leg against the chainring when you are stopped and get grease on your calf, this makes one a newb? I know of several riders that put in a few thousand miles a year (and have been riding for roughly 2 decades) that get this mark from time to time.

I happen to have a rather permanent one on my left calf, the product of hitting a mossy spot on a wet log mountainbiking and some rather impressive gymnastic moves (not pretty, just impressive).
 

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KonaMan said:
tdhood said:
Hmmm, lessee... Here's how I spot newbs:

10. Chainring tattoos on your right calf
QUOTE]

How does this identify someone as a newb? Just because you occasionally happen to lean your leg against the chainring when you are stopped and get grease on your calf, this makes one a newb?
It was explained to me that any "real roadie" would never let their chain get so dirty as to leave a chainring mark--agree though...dumb rule.
 

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cka1971 said:
9. Inability to ride a straight line.

I've been on a road bike before (when they were called 10-12 speeds. So, I hope this isn't an issue.
You'd be surprised. What an experienced rider would call a straight line and what most people would consider a straight line are not necessarily equivalent.

If you can ride only on the paint stripe on the side of the road, at speed, with a minimum of effort, then you're able to ride what an experienced rider thinks is a straight line. You don't really want to follow someone who's not able to track a three-inch stripe pretty consistently--when you're close behind, it looks like they're weaving all over the road.

Also, as the pace/effort picks up, it gets harder and harder to keep your line--heavy pedaling effort tends to translate up through your body to your arms. It's a real skill to separate what your legs are doing from the rest of your body.

You probably CAN ride a straight line--I just wanted to make sure you knew that a rational person's straight line may not be enough to "avoid looking like a total newbie" to the somewhat less rational experienced roadie.
 

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bikeboy389 said:
You don't really want to follow someone who's not able to track a three-inch stripe pretty consistently--when you're close behind, it looks like they're weaving all over the road.
You catch my meaning exactly. One of the guys in my regular group is like this & on first impressions, is exactly the guy whose wheel you want to suck. Big, wide & strong. Rides almost upright & can pull like a horse. Only problem is his form - he's not all over the road, but his goofy pedal stroke has him +/- 6" from his intended line.

Drives me nuts to be on his wheel - wears me out mentally more than anything.

tdh

(BTW - to all who missed the sarcasm & took umbrage with the chainring tattoo crack: White Lightning is your friend.)
 

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Bend your elbows when you ride. Supernewbs often lock 'em.

Ditto on the "no giant saddle bag" game. Newbs either bring NOTHING, or else play boy(girl)scout and pack an entire shop.

Get rid of reflects, kickstands, valve stem caps and nuts. Make sure QR's are both on non-drive side, not pointing in funny directions. Make sure brake QR's are closed, if applicable. Shift smoothly, and don't cross chain.

that's what I got on the top of my head...

---
And CKA, I don't know why "no helmet" is newbie. Seriously, I know we live in the United States of Mommy, and yes, I wear my helmet, but lots of experienced riders don't. But I don't wanna start a helmet thing...
 

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bahueh said:
buy a tight skinsuit, shave your legs, don't eat for a month while riding 300 miles a week...
you'll blend right in.
Out of all of these responses, this one works for me!

TT
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
bahueh said:
buy a tight skinsuit, shave your legs, don't eat for a month while riding 300 miles a week...
you'll blend right in.
OK.

1. I think even my wife would shudder at the thought of me in skintight anything

b. Shaving my legs would require an act of congress

iii. The only time I stop eating for more than 6 hours at a time is when I'm asleep and I can't even verify that

IV. I think it would take me a week, riding 8 hours a day, to go 300 miles. Since I have a full time job, I think that's out.

SO, does anyone want to buy a nearly new Felt F70?
:D :D
 

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tdhood said:
Hmmm, lessee... Here's how I spot newbs:

10. Chainring tattoos on your right calf .. Check :eek:

9. Inability to ride a straight line ... Sometimes :rolleyes:

8. Surging / slowing when it's your pull ... don't pull that much but I am a short pull and out :cool:

7. Kickstand / Reflectors / Spoke protector ... still got the spoke protector :(

6. Knee-high white tube socks ... not quite knee high :cool:

5. No helmet ... Always got the helmet :)

4. Chainring tattoos on your left calf ... that I haven't managed to do yet :confused:

3. Underwear under your lycra ... what about no lycra (still going on one pair of shorts and a few pairs of sport briefs with some athletic shorts) :eek:

2. Asking questions like "How do I keep from looking like a total newb?" on an internet forum. ... asked similar questions a few months ago

1. Answering questions like "How do I keep from looking like a total newb?" on an internet forum.
... :eek:
 

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Esse quam videri

cka1971 said:
Or is that a totally lost cause? :D Is there anything I should avoid getting/doing because it will instantaneously make me look like a total beginner?

TIA

C
The motto of the State of North Carolina: To be rather than to seem. There is nothing wrong with looking like a newbie. I think that the biggest mistake that a newbie can make is to pretend that he/she is experienced when he/she is not. When I was starting to ride, I made sure that everyone knew that I was a newbie. People would cut me some slack and give me suggestions and help. Don't worry about the style rules too much. I have seen very experienced cyclists violate almost every style rule that you will see here on RBR. For example, a certain RBR regular who probably rides more miles per year than anyone here has a relatively large bag on his bike. When it comes to style, do what makes sense for you. You should take note of the safety rules, however. You don't want to hurt yourself or others. T
 

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Don't worry, be happy.

cka1971 said:
Or is that a totally lost cause? :D Is there anything I should avoid getting/doing because it will instantaneously make me look like a total beginner?

TIA

C
About the only reply to this thread I agree with is "Don't wear underwear under (or over) your cycling shorts," but I am thinking there are exceptions to that too. How about just ride safely.....

As far as I am concerned anyone on a bicycle is a cyclist and good for them. If someone wants to make an issue of what you are wearing, what equipment you are running or what kind of bicycle you have they are the lost cause-not you.

Ride your bike and don't be anything but what you are.
 

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To expand upon posts above:
1. ride as much as you reasonably can
2. ride with a group at least once a week
3. ride with good riders when they are not hammering-or with them hammering if you are strong enough, but sit in the back and keep out of the way.
4. get set up on the bike-at least in the ball park. Good riders can help get you close and you readjust as your riding develops. Or pay $ to be fitted. If your frame size is really off, face up to it and get a frame that "fits".
5. elbows bent, hips rotated forward, back flat.
6. don't use too large (hard) gearing. Learn to spin at a cadence of 90+.
7. use clipless pedals and try not to fall over when you stop-but most of us have fallen at least once :)
8. I suggest not wearing a yellow jersey-you're not the leader of the TDF-and not wear pro or team jerseys

Classic sign of someone that doesn't kown how to ride, is seat way too low pushing a big gear at 50 rpm wobbling down the road sitting up right.
 
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