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Zaphod Beeblebrox
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I found Pr0n on the side of the road while out riding today. March 2005 Playboy. I stopped and picked it up since it was right in front of the Middle School (grades 3-6). I now resides in my recycling bin (My copy is in much better shape)

 

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Large Suburban Male
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3,599 Posts
DLMKA said:
I found Pr0n on the side of the road while out riding today. March 2005 Playboy. I stopped and picked it up since it was right in front of the Middle School (grades 3-6). I now resides in my recycling bin (My copy is in much better shape)

You actually stopped and picked up 4yo 'porn' (good move on taking it from a school)? And if the pic in your post is of 'pr0n', then you need to get out m0re. Playboy hasn't been 'pr0n' since before the interwebs, and Paris Hilton was pr0n for about a minute, 5 years ago.

There's better 'pr0n' out there.
 

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Formosan Cyclocross
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3,378 Posts
But back in the day... the incentive for exploring blackberry bushes was the chance of finding a Playboy in there. Back when a young fella had to work for it. Scour ditches and ravines with the faint hope of finding some salvageable material to hide in the tree house. Kids these days...
 

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Zaphod Beeblebrox
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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
I was out tooling around with the kiddos in the Burley, said pr()n and school are in my neighborhood. If it was 'Better Homes & Gardens' I would have stopped to pick up litter. I walk the streets around here every now and again with a garbage bag picking up trash. This time it just happened to be a 4 year old playboy.
 

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your text here
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Daj is right on. When I was growing up we looked at every scrap of paper flotsam hoping it was porn. And it worked more than you would think.

Best scores:
a friends parents owned some apartments. One of the residents kicked the bucket, leaving behind years of back issue playboys. It happened in the summer, so after every day summer band practice we would head over and cram as many issues into our trombone (I know...how phallic) cases. we divied them up, starting with our birthday months. then, because it was his parents property, I got one for every two.
I had a prime hiding spot in my house, but his hiding spot was better. Under the carpet in a second story crawl space in his room. We called it the playboy club: davenport.

2) this score was a video tape found outside a meat market on the way home from school. it was unmarked, but we knew what it was.

That summer was filled with riding bikes to each others houses in a trading syndicate. we would have the video playing in the background while we traded mags. One kid scored some penthouse mags, so those were worth about 2 playboys. Depending on what playboy it was. The year-end playmate recap and "year in movie sex" were prized playboys and could net a penthouse alone. Maybe even two.

By seventh grade we had found where the liquor was hidden, and had chick friends who had working parents with some sweet liquor cabinets. We would ride five to ten miles to get to their houses. we would drink, eat, try to kiss em up, and then have to ride the 5-10 miles home. Uphill. Buzzed. With blue balls.

Oh, to be that kid again...
 

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Goodbye, Pork Pie Hat
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DLMKA said:
I was out tooling around with the kiddos in the Burley, said pr()n and school are in my neighborhood. If it was 'Better Homes & Gardens' I would have stopped to pick up litter. I walk the streets around here every now and again with a garbage bag picking up trash. This time it just happened to be a 4 year old playboy.
Congratulations! Any pr0n is good pr0n. I found an old Penthouse in the fields behind our neighborhood when I was 8. I think of it as my first religious experience.

BTW, I have received your "shipment" and sent it along "Postage due" to the proper authorities.

"Updates" "to come". I'll be in touch.
 

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I ride in circles..
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My best find was coming home and finding my dad in my room with one of my mags.. I think I was around 16-17.. Father looks up and says.. "Hey at least you're not gay. Find a better hiding place."

I guess he was looking for our cat and it was laying on the floor. Under my nightstand. I didn't feel the need to hide it.. porn is better than drugs right? haha.
 

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Formosan Cyclocross
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3,378 Posts
Something like that happened to my friend.
He and his step-brother had a silent agreement to horde their swiped Playboys and stash them behind a floor level pipe in the rec room.

As the story was put to me... they loved that porn collection and had spend a couple years compiling a pretty sizable vault of pics.

One winter they went away for Christmas and the family had the neighbor watch the house. While they were gone, the pipes broke and flooded the basement.

When they returned the neighbor had cleaned everything up and my friend and his step brother both looked at each other nervously hoping that A) their porn had not been disturbed, and B) the neighbor wouldn't tell mom.

At the earliest possible convenience they raced to the basement and discovered the stash was missing. It had apparently been floating around the basement when the neighbor got there, covering the entire downstairs with nudie pictures.

The neighbor never told mom, but would occasionally make veiled referenced to what he had found.
 

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hit it
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DLMKA said:
I found Pr0n on the side of the road while out riding today. March 2005 Playboy. I stopped and picked it up since it was right in front of the Middle School (grades 3-6). I now resides in my recycling bin (My copy is in much better shape)
Somewhere there is one pissed off 6th grader...
 
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