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Shirtcocker
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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm not sure what is worse. A paper cut across your eyeball or writing your one page plan and performance highlights letter for the year. Sitting here staring at my screen and trying to thing in corporate-speak so my boss can put her usual comments and give me my usual raise and I can be done with this maddening exercise in futility! .......

interfaced, synergies, collaborated, cross-functional teams.....AHHHHHHH!!!!! My brain is starting to smoke from the strain...........................................
 

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Shirtcocker
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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Henry Chinaski said:
I'll sell you the one I wrote for $5.
I'm recycling 90% of my last years review as it is...change this project name to this project name--you get the idea...
 

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Shirtcocker
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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
bikeboy389 said:
Writing is no problem for me--even in corporate-speak.

What I hate is having to have "one of those talks" with a subordinate. I've got to give out a little to my assistant about a complaint I received, and I frigging hate it. I know the complainer is a total drama queen, but the point is valid at the root.

The trouble is that this is his first real job, so he doesn't always know what's expected of him in a given situation, and he nearly shits himself every time he comes into my office and has to shut the door.

It's weird--I have no trouble whatsoever beating up a vendor when I need to, in the strongest possible terms, even in person, but I just hate having to correct an employee.
having "one of those talks" with a "superior" is just as bad--everytime annual reviews come around I hope I can get out of "the talk" because no matter how much I prepare myself to take any criticism from my moron boss I always leave feeling crappy. Never gotten a bad review at this place though so I just sit there and take it and then get the same raise I always do.
 

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Fini les ecrase-"manets"!
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Writing is no problem for me--even in corporate-speak.

What I hate is having to have "one of those talks" with a subordinate. I've got to give out a little to my assistant about a complaint I received, and I frigging hate it. I know the complainer is a total drama queen, but the point is valid at the root.

The trouble is that this is his first real job, so he doesn't always know what's expected of him in a given situation, and he nearly shits himself every time he comes into my office and has to shut the door.

It's weird--I have no trouble whatsoever beating up a vendor when I need to, in the strongest possible terms, even in person, but I just hate having to correct an employee.
 

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Bocephus Jones II said:
having "one of those talks" with a "superior" is just as bad--everytime annual reviews come around I hope I can get out of "the talk" because no matter how much I prepare myself to take any criticism from my moron boss I always leave feeling crappy. Never gotten a bad review at this place though so I just sit there and take it and then get the same raise I always do.
a raise? whats that? it sucks when you produce and the company earns out the wazoo and...oh nevermind. i dont have the energy or hate left to talk about it.
 

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GIMME MY BIKE!
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Bocephus Jones II said:
I'm not sure what is worse. A paper cut across your eyeball or writing your one page plan and performance highlights letter for the year. Sitting here staring at my screen and trying to thing in corporate-speak so my boss can put her usual comments and give me my usual raise and I can be done with this maddening exercise in futility! .......

interfaced, synergies, collaborated, cross-functional teams.....AHHHHHHH!!!!! My brain is starting to smoke from the strain...........................................
I already b!tched about this in August.
 

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At least you get a raise. For several years, my company didn't give raises, which made the whole "performance review" pretty silly. If my performance is subpar, what are they going to do, not give me a raise?
 

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Shirtcocker
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Discussion Starter · #10 · (Edited)
mohair_chair said:
At least you get a raise. For several years, my company didn't give raises, which made the whole "performance review" pretty silly. If my performance is subpar, what are they going to do, not give me a raise?
Well I'm just assuming it will go as it has the last 4 years or so--no guarantees I guess. In any event it's never anything to write home about--usually 3-4%. So if you slack off and just "do what's expected" you get 3%--if you work your a$$ off and go above and beyond you can sometimes get another percent or 2--but that's only if the "bell curve" looks OK to the higher-ups--in that case a manager needs to knock some employees down in order to make the curve come out OK no matter how good of a job they did. And they wonder why motivation is a problem. ;)
 

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GIMME MY BIKE!
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haiku d'etat said:
here's what i heard on a call today: "wow! cool! i've never 'cut and pasted' before! you're a wizard!"

:rolleyes:
Were you working with my mom, by any chance? When I taught her how to draw a box around a bunch of files to select more than one at one time, she was flabbergasted.
:rolleyes:
 

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Strained coccyx etc etc
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working stinks. 96% of the time i get zero value or sense of accomplishment from work. i've never done anything rewarding, as a job.

4% i'm able to help somebody and they're genuinely touched--i've made someone's life a little better. that's the part i like.

my working time is split between mudane administration (robot work) and third-tier end-user support (occasionally engaging).

here's what i heard on a call today: "wow! cool! i've never 'cut and pasted' before! you're a wizard!"

:rolleyes:
 

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Shirtcocker
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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
haiku d'etat said:
here's what i heard on a call today: "wow! cool! i've never 'cut and pasted' before! you're a wizard!"

:rolleyes:
I taught my dad that one last week--he was manually typing stuff into emails. Funny what we take for granted.
 

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Fini les ecrase-"manets"!
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mohair_chair said:
At least you get a raise. For several years, my company didn't give raises, which made the whole "performance review" pretty silly. If my performance is subpar, what are they going to do, not give me a raise?
I'm not sure I'd have stuck around long enough to know the "no raises" thing lasted several years. I think two years max. That would SO suck--talk about demotivators.

That's one thing I can't complain about around here--they're pretty free with the cash, in a fiscally responsible way.
 

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One place I used to work budgeted for a 4% salary increase every year. No new hiring unless it fit into that budget. The factory was union, and got 4% across the board every year. The upper management then gave themselves the raises they deserved, and everyone else got about 2%.

I like my job now, I just don't like the paperwork.
 

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Bocephus Jones II said:
Well I'm just assuming it will go as it has the last 4 years or so--no guarantees I guess. In any event it's never anything to write home about--usually 3-4%. So if you slack off and just "do what's expected" you get 3%--if you work your a$$ off and go above and beyond you can sometimes get another percent or 2--but that's only if the "bell curve" looks OK to the higher-ups--in that case a manager needs to knock some employees down in order to make the curve come out OK no matter how good of a job they did. And they wonder why motivation is a problem. ;)
Pretty much nailed it. And what was inflation last year? 3.5%?
 

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Fini les ecrase-"manets"!
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bikeboy389 said:
Writing is no problem for me--even in corporate-speak.

What I hate is having to have "one of those talks" with a subordinate. I've got to give out a little to my assistant about a complaint I received, and I frigging hate it. I know the complainer is a total drama queen, but the point is valid at the root.

The trouble is that this is his first real job, so he doesn't always know what's expected of him in a given situation, and he nearly shits himself every time he comes into my office and has to shut the door.

It's weird--I have no trouble whatsoever beating up a vendor when I need to, in the strongest possible terms, even in person, but I just hate having to correct an employee.
So, I just finished "the talk." It wasn't really all that bad, and it never is (I haven't had to sh*tcan anyone yet, though). So I guess I'd amend my response to be that I hate unnecessarily dreading "one of those talks."
 

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I work freelance so for me looking for work is the worst part of work. Case in point, I'm out of work now and should be looking for work but no, I'm cruising RBR and riding my bike. :)
 

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Strained coccyx etc etc
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vonteity said:
Were you working with my mom, by any chance? When I taught her how to draw a box around a bunch of files to select more than one at one time, she was flabbergasted.
:rolleyes:
i get people who don't know how to use the keyboard, which way the backslash points, where to find the escape key, what their email program is called :)rolleyes:),...

to TC's (technology cowboys, yee haw!) who play video games at home and surf the internets so they TOTALLY KNOW what they're doing although they called for help anyway...

to people who are ESL and don't speak EITHER language passably.

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

i have remote assistance and remote control. but the people who need to be "remote controlled" the most, are view-only for me.

wtf?
 

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freakin' meetings

that turn into hen fests. I have work that has to get done, the gals get yawwing in a meeting and it turns into a half day killer. They pack their A$$es home at clsoing,I stay til I'm done which is now due to their freakin meeting 2 hrs plus later.

we had a meeting the day of our little off site XMas party. I was getting irritated as I had deadlines and they were giving me crap for being testy. They all left to go to the event at 2:30, I showed up about 5 when they were leaving. I gave them double middle finger salutes.
 
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