Road Bike, Cycling Forums banner
1 - 20 of 42 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
61 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I keep see references to rule numbers. Sorry for my ignorance. I've been riding for 43 years but never got the list of rules. Can someone p.ease point me in the direction I might find this list of rules?
Thanks very much.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5,062 Posts
I constantly break many of these rules. sometimes I even do it intentionally.

The most glaring rule breaking I do is totell people it's about the engine, not the bike. Killing rule #4 dead in it's tracks as I pass that $5000 carbon wonder on my $1000 entry level rig in a kit that isn't even close to matching..........................
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
61 Posts
Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Well, thanks a lot for the link to the rules. Unfortunately I am going to have to sell my bike because after all these years I found out I'm a douche.
Nice riding with you all.










Just kidding.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
941 Posts
The person who wrote these rules was spot on on many issues, pretty close on other, but at the same time they got some totally wrong.

For me the most glaring miss was the CO2 bit. In reality, using CO2 pumps is completely unacceptable (read: you can use them as long as no one knows about it). The tires should be inflated by hand-pumps only: either a floor pump or a mini pump. No CO2 allowed under any circumstances. If you ever get caught using a CO2 pump in public make sure you never touch a bike again. Switch to skateboarding or, better, figure skating.

Contrary to what another bogus rule says, the mini pump shall always be carried in the open on the left-hand side of the downtube, sharing the mounting points with the primary bottle cage.

Finally, the less mainstream the brand of your mini pump is - the better.
 

·
Burnum Upus Quadricepus
Joined
·
2,017 Posts
My favorite is rule nine.

I work in a library--an occupation not normally associated with badassness or hardmen. Plus, I have definite Fred tenancies. :eek:

Cycling in the wind, rain and snow, rule nine erases all that. :thumbsup:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,119 Posts
My favorite is rule nine.

I work in a library--an occupation not normally associated with badassness or hardmen. Plus, I have definite Fred tenancies. :eek:

Cycling in the wind, rain and snow, rule nine erases all that. :thumbsup:
brucew,

I've seen your photos and you are the most hard core library dude out there!

Here in Florida we start *****in n moanin when it gets below 60F. Saw pics of your winter ride and realized how soft I am!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,585 Posts
The person who wrote these rules was spot on on many issues, pretty close on other, but at the same time they got some totally wrong.

For me the most glaring miss was the CO2 bit. In reality, using CO2 pumps is completely unacceptable (read: you can use them as long as no one knows about it).
If you want to be a wanna-be pro racer, then you have to use CO2. Strapping a mini-pump on your bike will not make it look "pro".
 

·
waterproof*
Joined
·
41,611 Posts
A bit of context for everyone: those rules were written ironically... tongue in cheek... poking a bit of fun at the uptight roadies.

Which, to me, is the funniest part, since clueless roadies have embraced "the rules" as absolute truth.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12,085 Posts
Some of the rules are practical. Some are just rules made up by people who need many rules in their lives.

If you want to be a wanna-be pro racer, then you have to use CO2. Strapping a mini-pump on your bike will not make it look "pro".
Most riders I know use CO2 for the simple fact that it's fast. When you're on a group ride with a bunch of your friends, it's good to keep things moving.
 

·
Banned forever.....or not
Joined
·
24,554 Posts
"The Rules" are a good starting point......but..

I have a problem with...

#13. I love race#13.
#14. I wear my team's kit, and the bibs are dark navy.
#15. I'm not sorry I wore a Championship jersey with my team kit bibs.
#18. I don't have anything besides road jerseys.
and finally
#24. Sorry, I count things in miles.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
596 Posts
A bit of context for everyone: those rules were written ironically... tongue in cheek... poking a bit of fun at the uptight roadies.

Which, to me, is the funniest part, since clueless roadies have embraced "the rules" as absolute truth.
But there are a few tidbits of sage advice mixed in there as well. Sometimes, the "right way" to do things is simply the result of years of trial and error by others, and I'm happy to benefit from their experience.

I do love the rules -- I just read 'em again for the entertainment and enlightenment value. Very well written with funny pictures to boot. Plus, while 80% of us understand that they are satirical in nature and intent, there is always the 10% on one side who feel judged for their actions and get defensive, and the 10% on the other side who feel vindicated by the rules as justification for their douchebaggery. Which always makes any reference to the rules even more fun!
 

·
Batteries not required
Joined
·
1,035 Posts
The best rules are:
9, 12, 58, 68, and, my favorite - 85 - "All descents shall be undertaken at speeds commonly regarded as “ludicrous” or “insane” by those less talented . . ."
YES! Love that rule.
 

·
Batteries not required
Joined
·
1,035 Posts
"The Rules" are a good starting point......but..

I have a problem with...

#13. I love race#13....
I'm with you. I love #13 just because some people are scared of it! I've been on elevators that don't have a "13" button even though there is a 13th floor! That boggles my mind! :mad2:
 

·
'brifter' is f'ing stupid
Joined
·
15,667 Posts
The person who wrote these rules was spot on on many issues, pretty close on other, but at the same time they got some totally wrong.

For me the most glaring miss was the CO2 bit. In reality, using CO2 pumps is completely unacceptable (read: you can use them as long as no one knows about it). The tires should be inflated by hand-pumps only: either a floor pump or a mini pump. No CO2 allowed under any circumstances. If you ever get caught using a CO2 pump in public make sure you never touch a bike again. Switch to skateboarding or, better, figure skating.

Contrary to what another bogus rule says, the mini pump shall always be carried in the open on the left-hand side of the downtube, sharing the mounting points with the primary bottle cage.

Finally, the less mainstream the brand of your mini pump is - the better.
If you want to be a wanna-be pro racer, then you have to use CO2. Strapping a mini-pump on your bike will not make it look "pro".
neither one of you guys are correct...if you want to look "pro" you use a frame pump. doesn't matter what type of frame you ride, you find a way to make it work. no mini pumps, ever.
 
1 - 20 of 42 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top