Chief Road Officer
I go to a bootcamp every day and Thursday is run day. So I’m running my 5k this morning at 6:15 and it’s quite dark. There are a two of runners a couple hundred yards ahead of me and I’m watching their blinkies move along. Their blinkies stop moving at one point and I can see them kinda stooped over under a streetlight like they’re looking for something and then they start running again. A minute later I get to where they were stopped and just past the streetlight I feel this big whoosh and feel talons trying to grip the top of my bald head. I see my shadow from the streetlight behind and there’s this enormous bird flying off. I think I yelled wtf or something else profane and paused a few seconds to look around and started running again. Ten seconds later it hits me again and pulls my croakie and glasses over the top of my head. I was able to grab them before they came completely off. I yelled some more profanities and looked around in the dark some more and then started running again, thinking I gotta get the hell outa here. Fifteen seconds later it happens a third time with talons scraping the back of my neck. At this point I started walking backwards looking at the sky flailing my arms over my head. I got what I figured was a safe distance away and started running again without being strafed. I got back to our bootcamp center and found that the people who I’d seen running ahead of me had also been attacked. The women said maybe she should start wearing a hat and I said maybe I should start wearing my helmet when I run. Now I got a bunch of scratches and gouges on my head and neck and a story to tell. It was a large bird and I’m guessing it was an owl. I don’t know.