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chica cyclista
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2,842 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
okay since it's warming up in Boulder and I've already seen a number of flagrant violations, I'd like to get this off my chest early this year. Now, I'm not much of an open toed shoe gal myself (bike racers have about as ugly feet as runners or ballet dancers) but I can definitely appreciate, and envy, the impact of a pair of Cute Shoes on a cute chica with a good pedicure. see? I'm a generous person! but man, Boulder... :: shudder :: I mean people here think Birks with white crew socks are the height of fashion! ugh, ick ew, etc, etc, and all that.

So in the spirit of the post-your-feet pics (and I have, just, for the reasons stated above I don't do the toe thing) I thought I'd send out a little reminder to the distaff side of RBR. not that any of you chicas here would be so gauche as to actually violate this, cos we all know you're way too fashionable, but one never knows, and a reminder never hurts. and besides I am pissed because while riding thru Boulder a few minutes ago I not only saw the ubiquitous Birkenoffenders, but also one hippy chick with the nastiest dirty bare feet ever, and (o horrors!) an otherwise attractive young miss wearing what I swear to god were pink Jellies from 1983. I mean what the hell? I never wore those when they WERE in fashion... christ even *I* knew better and I was fourteen!

(with apologies to best-of-craigslist philly for stealing this):

place your right hand over your heart and repeat after me:

As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules
when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:

I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the
sides and tops of my feet will not protrude out between the straps.

I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe. I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker,
mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell
and begin to look like Vienna sausages. If I have been privy to the magic that is Foot Soup; I will share that knowledge and experience with the non-initiated.

I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend / sister / coworker when
she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

I will promise to go my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $20 and worth EVERY penny).

I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear...nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.


that is all.
 

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Zeppelin/Ultegra Rider
Joined
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930 Posts
You may have left out the most important one of all

If I am lucky enough to have "nice" feet, I promise to post pics at RBR.


lonefrontranger said:
place your right hand over your heart and repeat after me:

As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules
when I wear sandals and other open-toe shoes:

I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the
sides and tops of my feet will not protrude out between the straps.

I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe. I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.

I will shave the hairs off my big toe.

I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker,
mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if I tuck it there.

If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.

I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr. Scholl's if my feet need him.

I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids' sizes This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others. No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.

I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell
and begin to look like Vienna sausages. If I have been privy to the magic that is Foot Soup; I will share that knowledge and experience with the non-initiated.

I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend / sister / coworker when
she asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy feet look good.

I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.

I will promise to go my local beauty school at least once per season and have a real pedicure (they are about $20 and worth EVERY penny).

I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show signs of wear...nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.


that is all.
 

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Strained coccyx etc etc
Joined
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21,050 Posts
post a toe pic. of yerself. i'm moving to boulder.
 

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Palm trees & sunshine!
Joined
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24,200 Posts
lonefrontranger said:
I will shave the hairs off my big toe.
Of utmost importance that this rule is followed. J's may like the way those toe hairs get stuck in his teeth but I just can't abide.
 

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chica cyclista
Joined
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2,842 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
I'd definitely lose

dperk789 said:
2nd that. As a matter of fact how bout a contest, who has the prettiest? :p
I don't do pedicures. 10-12 hours a week in stiff-soled carbon cycling shoes does horrendous things to one's feet. only runners and/or ballet dancers have nastier looking feet than bike racers.

I like doing girly things and to borrow a quote from snapdragen, I'm a bit of a cosmetics wh0re (was a model and a dancer as a bright young thing, half a lifetime ago) but I'm comfortably resigned to the fact that I'll never have pretty feet. Thus I rarely to never do the open toed shoe deal, unless it's sidi slaps at a bike race.
 

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Registered
Joined
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1,097 Posts
lonefrontranger said:
I don't do pedicures. 10-12 hours a week in stiff-soled carbon cycling shoes does horrendous things to one's feet. only runners and/or ballet dancers have nastier looking feet than bike racers.

I like doing girly things and to borrow a quote from snapdragen, I'm a bit of a cosmetics wh0re (was a model and a dancer as a bright young thing, half a lifetime ago) but I'm comfortably resigned to the fact that I'll never have pretty feet. Thus I rarely to never do the open toed shoe deal, unless it's sidi slaps at a bike race.
See, all this talk gets us guys really hot. There again, apparently anything having to do with the female anatomy, or females, tends to do that to me. I must be a sex-addict or something. Like Michael Douglas. Or not.
 

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Not Banned
Joined
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49,013 Posts
open toed shoes nice

if toes nice otherwise ecckkkkkkk
if nice, yes do. oh and preferrably operating the pedals of an automobile.
skirt must cover the knees, no hose.


kidding.
 

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Strained coccyx etc etc
Joined
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21,050 Posts
atpjunkie said:
if toes nice otherwise ecckkkkkkk
if nice, yes do. oh and preferrably operating the pedals of an automobile.
skirt must cover the knees, no hose.


kidding.
ATP, you just descibed me, to the tee, from last saturday nite.
 

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Zeppelin/Ultegra Rider
Joined
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930 Posts
haiku d'etat said:
ATP, you just descibed me, to the tee, from last saturday nite.
Gawd I hope you had shaved your legs. Few things nastier than a bad case of calf stubble.
 
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