Put your floor pump in a bucket of water.

Inflate your buddies tires with that water.

That'll slow 'em down!

 

there are lots, but you'd better not screw with someone's bike unless you know 'em real well...

 

there are lots, but you'd better not screw with someone's bike unless you know 'em real well...

Sage advice!!
I don't think I've ever even considered messing with any of my buddies bikes...

 

One of my riding buddies will contstantly come up behind me and grab my jersey by the pocket from behind when wer're going up hill. This is not the most fun thing when you're doin all you can just stay up and he passes you by not even breathing hard. Since we're both speedskaters this is akin to us being behind someone in a pack grabbing them on the right hip with our right hand and passing them on on the left just before a left hand corner. There's nothing the person being pulled can do unless they want to take both of them out.

Craig

 

Put your floor pump in a bucket of water.

Inflate your buddies tires with that water.

That'll slow 'em down!

Simple yet devious...I like it.

Someone once told me (unsubstantiated) that they filled a friend's frame with sand to the same effect. I wouldn't want to do that because it could cause damage, but funny anecdotally.

Hoffman

 

One of my riding buddies will contstantly come up behind me and grab my jersey by the pocket from behind when wer're going up hill. This is not the most fun thing when you're doin all you can just stay up and he passes you by not even breathing hard. Since we're both speedskaters this is akin to us being behind someone in a pack grabbing them on the right hip with our right hand and passing them on on the left just before a left hand corner. There's nothing the person being pulled can do unless they want to take both of them out.

Craig

usta be you could nudge them into a higher gear up a hill... prob still can w/ campy

 

Simple yet devious...I like it....Hoffman

Try it on your own bike first, it is really noticable because of the weight and harsh ride (water ain't got no "give").

 

How about a zip-tie somewhere on the frame so the end sticks out into the spokes, crank, or other rotating part? Easy to fix, no permanent damage, and madness until the victim figures out the source of the ticking.

 

Riding and goofin' on them is different....
I'm guilty of pocket draggin' myself, I like to also do the underseat grab and seeing how long it takes for them to notice.... I think that goes under BALL bustin more than messing with their rides....

 

Back in the day

when I worked in a bike shop (20 yrs. ago) we would put freewheel bodies in seat bags. They were plenty heavy but compact. (If you don't know what a FW is; that's from the time before free hubs and cassettes!)

 

when I worked in a bike shop (20 yrs. ago) we would put freewheel bodies in seat bags. They were plenty heavy but compact. (If you don't know what a FW is; that's from the time before free hubs and cassettes!)

To weigh the victim down? I'm a bike commuter typically w/ 15lbs or so of crap in my msgr bag, I doubt I'd notice a FW...even on a ride w/o the bag.

Hoffman

 

I like to gradually, almost imperceptibly close up the "personal space" so the guy I'm riding with slowly gets pinched into the curb. Freaks out a lot of guys, but the old school bar bangers will just lean on me and keep riding.

 

I like to gradually, almost imperceptibly close up the "personal space" so the guy I'm riding with slowly gets pinched into the curb. Freaks out a lot of guys, but the old school bar bangers will just lean on me and keep riding.

The guy who taught me to ride did this to me a lot. He'd get on my left and basically tuck his right hbar behind my left hbar. Totally scary at first

Hoffman

 

How about a zip-tie somewhere on the frame so the end sticks out into the spokes, crank, or other rotating part? Easy to fix, no permanent damage, and madness until the victim figures out the source of the ticking.

We do this every year to somebody on our Ragbrai team who isn't mechanically inclined. We go on and on about how the BB is shot or their rear wheel is going to cost $500 to fix. Lots of fun once the gig is up. We used to have a piece of lead that was half the size of a Hershey bar. Slip that into someone's saddle bag.

 

I like to gradually, almost imperceptibly close up the "personal space" so the guy I'm riding with slowly gets pinched into the curb. Freaks out a lot of guys, but the old school bar bangers will just lean on me and keep riding.

This lets me know just how far down the totem pole I am right now. If someone did that to me.. I would definately be making friends with the curb. LOL.. But I would be on the delivering end if it were speedskating! I know every trick in the book.

 

An ex-girlfriend taught me this one, and now I wear bibs to protect myself.

She would come up behind me, grab my shorts and pull them down over the back of my saddle.

Hilarity ensued.

 

ooooh. I like this one...........hmmmm

 

Relieving pressure

Late to the party so a lot have already been mentioned. Remember a mind is a terrible thing to waste and when it is a weak mind it is really easy to screw with.

Line up for a race and just before the start tell your buddy you prerode the course and found the corners handled best with 10# lower p.s.i. so you let some air out of his tires too as a favor. He wont have time to pinch the tires to test them and will spend the whole race thinking he is running on low tires. His mind will screw with his legs the whole race.

Another race trick for a crit is to sit in one of the corners. Just as the pack come screaming through the corner take a pop can and rake it across the sidewalk. You can almost hear everyone's butthole pucker up as they think they hear the crash happening. After a couple of laps it is recommended that you make yourself scarce because someone will be looking for your soon.

 

Early one morning I dropped my buddy off at the top of the Chesapeake Bay Bridge. Bikes on the bridge are definitely a no-no. From the top, it's about a mile and a half downhill at about a 6% grade to the toll booths. He blew through the booths at about 45mph then made the first exit, I loaded up his bike and we made our escape before the bridge police could catch us.

For all you locals: Yes, this happened before they removed the toll booths on the westbound lanes of Rt. 50. and when the first exit actually exited.

 

I like to gradually, almost imperceptibly close up the "personal space" so the guy I'm riding with slowly gets pinched into the curb. Freaks out a lot of guys, but the old school bar bangers will just lean on me and keep riding.

That must make me a bar banger....
We'd do the elbow banger/nudger just for sh!ts and giggles all the time 2

 

We took a buddy's left crank arm off, rotated 1/8 turn and reinstalled. We couldn't keep our faces straight, so he noticed before he actually got on.

 

Reaching over and grabbing your friends brake on a long climb is always a good way to break up the monotony....

 

Stealth

there are lots, but you'd better not screw with someone's bike unless you know 'em real well...

Here's a more stealthy approach. Stay a half wheel behind the rider but be close on one side. With a light touch, grab the back of their saddle or their seat bag, and then ease up on your pedals. Just as they start to feel the effort of pulling you along, ask them if they have a flat tire. Works (nearly) every time

 

Worked in a bike shop during college - here are my three favorites.

Packing a bike for shipping and wrapping the tubes in porn mags.

If someone is a jerk, throw some chicken down the seat tube - way down. It will smell bad for two months, but a week or so after the shop visit, and you can't get it it out much less even identify where the smell is coming from.

One guy picked up his bike and didn't fasten it properly to his roof rack, drove off, biek feel off, bikes was damaged in a big way. He came into the shop, threw a fir and left the bike. We took the bike over to the mechanic, who missed the exchange, and asked him if he worked on the bike. He said he did and we said the quick release wasn't on properly and the guy went for a ride and wiped out and an ambulance took him away. Needless to say the guy was upset for sometime.

 

I like to rub tires with my newb friends, freaks them right out!