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Tools, spare tube and patch kit, etc., are in a small bag under the seat (stays on the bike at all times). Phone, food and other stuff you might want to access more often go in jersey pockets. If I need to bring a key when on a recreational ride, I just bring the house key, not the whole ring.

On my commute, when I carry more stuff than on a recreational ride, (phone, wallet, keys, spare glasses, etc.) I use a fanny pack, which I find more comfortable on the bike than anything on my shoulders. If I have more to carry on a given day, the commuter bike has a rack, on which I can strap stuff or hang panniers.

But for the usual fun ride with a minimal load, jersey pockets plus the little seat bag are what I prefer.
 
To answer your question, most commonly, a saddle bag.

Here's my 'essentials' list. It changes some depending on the type, location and duration of rides, but will give you a general idea of what you might want to bring along:

Wedge saddle bag - medium (Topeak/ Specialized are two good brands)
Tire levers
Spare tube(s)
Patch kit
Piece of old tube or 1$ bill to use as a 'boot'
Innovations Ultraflate Plus CO2 inflator
2-3 12-16g unthreaded carts (I get the 12g's by the box at Walmart)
Multitool w/ chain breaker
Mini-pump (if you don't trust CO2 alone) - I do.

Not essential, but nice to have:
Road ID
Rag/ paper towels
Latex gloves
Waterless soap (Gojo, or similar)
A second tube, if it'll fit

Optional:
Mini-pump
Lights

I would strongly recommend a Road ID bracelet. Their basic model (Wrist ID Sport) will do. Also, a floor pump, but keep that home. :)

Two more things. 1) A computer with cadence function. Wired or wireless, depending on preferences/ budget. FWIW, I like Cateyes. 2) Camelbak Podium insulated bottles. I think there's both a chill (20-21 oz.) and big (24-25 oz.) version.
 
Get some heavy sandwich bags and put your electronics in that in your jersey, keeps them dry when your sweating. I keep my canisters/air unit in my jersey, as I am always changing bikes and don't want to have to buy 5 units.
 
under the seat saddle bag for tire tools and tube...jersey pockets for everything else...the exception is that when I am going to be on a long ride and am expecting important work related calls I have a phone mount that I put on my handlebar...sometimes I can not hear the phone ring in my jersey pocket if in heavy traffic or wind.
 
Like most people I store the pump, tube, tools etc on the bike.

I put the phone and keys in a jersey pocket. Clothes and food also go in jersey pockets.
I don't bother to put the phone in a bag. I used to work for a cell phone company and had lots of phones. It turns out that at least for me that if sweat kills them it takes at least a couple years. I've only had one die and don't know for sure that it was sweat that did it. YMMV of course.

Don't tie your jacket around your waist or the seat post. If it get sucked into your rear wheel you're going down hard.
 
When I'm out on a "ride" (i.e the weekend) with the gang, everything goes in my jersey pockets. I genuinely dislike underseat bags. Aesthetically, they are a disaster. When viewed from the rear, one is reminded of a male bulldog.

LEFT POCKET: cleat covers, house key, Clif Shot or other small snack.

CENTER POCKET: Crank Bros. mini-tool, tube, glueless patches (ARRRRGH!), Wipperman Campy 10 speed link, Mini pump. 15mm wrench if I am on one of the fixies. All of this (except pump) is in a plastic baggie.

RIGHT POCKET: old flip phone, driver's license, Health Insurance ID card and signed statement authorizing treatment, $10 for snacks and coffee. All of this (except for driver's license) is in a plastic baggie.

Road ID on my wrist, with my contact and medical information. Yes, it comes in handy.l

That's it.
 
We ought to emphasize that when we say jersey pockets, it means we're putting the stuff into the pockets that are at the bottom of the back of the jersey. The location is by far the most comfortable place to store 'em. And soon you'll be able to access those pockets while riding...just like a pro.
 
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Tools, spare tube and patch kit, etc., are in a small bag under the seat (stays on the bike at all times). Phone, food and other stuff you might want to access more often go in jersey pockets. If I need to bring a key when on a recreational ride, I just bring the house key, not the whole ring.

On my commute, when I carry more stuff than on a recreational ride, (phone, wallet, keys, spare glasses, etc.) I use a fanny pack, which I find more comfortable on the bike than anything on my shoulders. If I have more to carry on a given day, the commuter bike has a rack, on which I can strap stuff or hang panniers.

But for the usual fun ride with a minimal load, jersey pockets plus the little seat bag are what I prefer.
Saddle bag for all bike repair items.
Phone goes in jersey pocket.
I made a copy of my car key to a generic one without the giant black housing. It stays in my saddle bag and keys get locked in the car.
Get some heavy sandwich bags and put your electronics in that in your jersey, keeps them dry when your sweating. I keep my canisters/air unit in my jersey, as I am always changing bikes and don't want to have to buy 5 units.
What Duriel said about the sandwich bag. I call it my "ride wallet"

Everything stays dry and it's easy to pull it out and not have to worry about dropping a $20 or something as you pull something else out
 
We ought to emphasize that when we say jersey pockets, it means we're putting the stuff into the pockets that are at the bottom of the back of the jersey. The location is by far the most comfortable place to store 'em. And soon you'll be able to access those pockets while riding...just like a pro.
Amen, bro. Being handy with snacks and stuff on the fly = jersey pockets.

One confession - there was a time when I would slip packs of energy gel under the elastic leg gripper of my bibs. I'd keep one end of the gel sticking out so I could grab it easily on the fly.

It.

Looked.

Goofy.

So, despite the superior ergonomics, and enhanced on-bike gel access I quietly ended that practice.
 
Like others - I have a small streamlined under seat bag for tubes, CO2 cartridges and tools, it stays on the bike, Lezyne min-pump is mounted with a water bottle cage, phone and food goes in jersey pockets. The phone first goes into a Loksack iPhone bag - protects it from sweat, rain, or whatever.

I'm thinking about adding a Speed Box to carry the food stuff for longer rides (> 2hrs).
 
I always keep my stuff in a under seat bag. I used to carry a minipump but now I like those cartridges. Though, luckily, I tend not to get flats :)

I also have one of those water bottle carriers. It's designed to store a tires, tools, etc in it. The only problem is if you use it in your water bottle cage, then you have one less water bottle assuming you don't put it in your jersey pocket.

But I try to minimize everything. No reason to being a gigantic ring of keys, only bring what you need.
 
That's cause he's always behind... staring at saddle bags. He needs to get out front so he doesn't seem them so much. :D
Old adage - If you're not the lead dog, the view never changes.
 
Depends what you need o carry. Check out local bike shops and online searches to find bags and brackets to handle your needs.Here is my set up before a 400 mile, unsupported ride. 4 tubes, a tire, multiple lighting systems with external batteries, 4 water bottles, top tube bag. A change of clothes went into a small backpack and I washed my kit in a hotel room sink. They dry quickly
 

Attachments

Ladies and Gentlemen, I Give You The Scrote-Tote

Pity the rest of us, or at least the vast majority of us, who fall under your scornful gaze.
Scorn? No. Pity? Possibly. But not so much pity that I cannot see the commercial opportunity presented by this unfortunate aesthetic scenario.

Perhaps this is a good time to introduce you to my latest idea for a cycling accessory.

I think that I am on safe ground when I posit that, given a choice, most cyclists would prefer to ride an attractive bike. Something sleek, something stylish, something that is a personal statement. A bike that reflects who we are and, most importantly, who we wish to be to the outside world. A bike that says - either quietly or at the top of one's voice - "This is ME! And I am COOL!" to both neophytes and cognoscenti alike.

This urge is reflected in the near-universal desire of the average cyclist to personalize their bike. It is a verity of the cycling world - indeed, a major percentage of the bicycle industry is based upon this foible of human nature - that a bicycle will rarely remain very long in the same configuration in which it left the factory. The average cyclist will at some point give in to the urge to accessorize; to separate him- or her-self from the pack and do something to make their bike different from the others, to make it more their own.

Again, we tend to choose accessories or new components out of a desire to not only enhance the function of their bike, but also to add to the look, to make it more of a personal expression of ourselves.

But for each individual cyclist in the market for a cycling accessory, the decision as to which accessory to choose can be predicted by envisioning a graph which plots the point at which personal taste intersects with aesthetics and good taste. Most cycling products attempt to hit the market that lies at the upper end of the personal taste/pleasing aesthetics curve - the area noted for cleverness, sophistication and pleasing aesthetics. For an accessory-maker this is a safe plan; one can presume that the average cyclist appreciates high functionality and clean design.

Yet there is a sizable and hitherto underserved portion of the market represented by the lower end of the scale, where personal taste intersects (ahem) somewhat farther down the curve of good taste.

I'm talking about the place on the graph where the idea of an "anatomically correct" tool bag has a certain appeal.

In other words, a tool bag with balls.

For those less-than-discerning cyclists I give you...

Scrote-Tote

Are you tired of that saggy under seat tool bag hanging under your saddle? The one that merely hints at the fact that it looks like a set of testicles on a flatulent English bull dog? How about a product that allows you to show other cyclists that both you and your bike are loud, proud, and well-endowed? That you're packin' in your bike pants and damn proud of it?

Inspired by those wacky faux-scrotums that adorn pick-up truck trailer hitches across the nation (TruckNutz - The Ultimate Truck Accessory™), Scrote-Tote is cycling's version of a big ol' ball-sack that hangs from your saddle. Sure, its a set of fake testicles for your bike...and that's totally *****in'!...but Scrote-Tote is so much more than that! Crafted from strong-yet-supple flesh toned Lorica, the Scrote Tote also carries your tools and tubes while it shows off your franks and beans.

And for the cyclist out to show the world that road cyclists aren't a bunch of effeminate pansies on bikes riding around in yoga pants and taking up valuable space out on the road, Scrote-Tote is nothing less than a complete revolution in underseat tool bags. Pushed around by trucks and cars out on the road? Not any more, big fella. There'll be no questions now about who has the biggest balls on the highways and by-ways of our fair land! It will be you and your bike!.

Scrote-Tote, the Bag that Makes you Brag (tm)
 
haven't used a seatbag in decades.

all roadside repair items go in a heavy-duty gallon ziploc bag which is carried in a jersey pocket.

cheap, easy to find stuff, don't have to have duplicate repair stuff when riding different bikes, and crap doesn't rattle.

food, keys, phone go in the other available pockets.
 
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